Top 10 Reasons suicide is better than Sex.

Suicide is Better than Sex

Ohh don't get freak out by the topic I'm not about to end my living day life in that particular fashion. However I really don't ever can grasp the concept of voluntary self extermination, because the fact all life has the self preservation mechanism in place. It is part of the evolution itself. I'm not saying this because of some spiritual obligation or political agenda. However I believe that the passage of time will eventually show the reason to oneself of the disparity that dwell upon without any answer. Life itself is precious any conceivable ways, ones must face the fact that all of us are alive for a unique reason no matter how bleak their individual situation that they in. Anyway it is just self thought reflection after all.

10. You can still commit suicide when you're shitface drunk.

9. You don't have to worry about "Safe Suicide".

8. Nobody wakes you up to ask for more.

7. No limit to the number of techniques.

6. Nobody ever asks for a long-term suicide commitment.

5. Who cares if you get disease ?

4. Doing it yourself is just as good !

3. It's easier than finding a date on Saturday night.

2.Nobody ever complains about "bad suicide".

1 You don't have to clean up the mess !

apparently this is a common knowledge in Palestine
(Palestinian Boy Dressed as Suicide Bomber in Ramallah (Reuters))

     

Guide for a good Panda Chasing in Thailand

Today Ive received a message from Mr. Nasty Raps

So check this out. One of the guys I work with goes to Bangkok a few times every year. He ended up getting an apt for his girls there, and has now married one of them! He's in the process of getting her over here. Is that shit normal? Is it that good over there? Is that like her hitting the lottery?

Another guy here just booked a ticket there for this fall. Any advice for him? Say something that leads him not to marry a Thai prostitute.

Let me know
Nasty

Well when the subject from the land of the smile show up why I'm always been appointed to be an expert about the Thai contemporary culture? I can assure you that I would not be the ultimate source on anything Thai. However I'm confident that throughout the time that I have been hanging out with a few Robin hoods here in D town throughout 15 plus years I have accumulated enough knowledge on the inner working of the modern Thai social behavior through the eyes of an Asian Thai, me. On this particular topic of intercontinental Panda Chasing I do feel certain obligation to prevent my fellow American Panda Chaser from falling victim to rent a girlfriend. To Mr. Nasty Raps defense I really do believe there are certain group of American men often falls madly in love with the first Thai girl they meet - even if she's a rough street prostitute who doesn't speak English. Love-sick farang men are queuing up at the altar to tie the knot with their dubious Thai girls, which can lead to VDs, paying for her green card to pursue her own pleasurable entrepreneurship, or lost of entire life saving. If you don't want to believe me, statistically when normal couple marries with the best intentions, the chances of success are barely 50/50. Mixed race marriages are even more fragile. Throw a Thai con-woman into the mix and your misery is guaranteed. If she is an ex-hooker, the divorce courts won't reproach her for fucking your friends, neighbors and teenage sons either.

Kirk Sato's guide for a good Panda Chasing in Thailand

10. Never pickup a college student that hangout around RCA and Pat Pong on a school night. Common you know why they are there for a reason.

9. Massage parlor and Go-Go bar is not a productive dating place no matter how

drunk and delusional you might be.

8. Do prepare that more then likely youre making way more money then her because I don't need to remind you that its still a third world nation. So prepare to pay up on the dates. However, if you noticed how often she talks about her financial problems. If you didn't get the hint, she will have to ask you for money more bluntly. So bail!

7. If she got an expensive cell and it rings constantly chances are its her Gig calling. (Thai Slang for fuck buddies) Thai girls do not have close male friends - western or Thai - only suitors and punters.

6. Fluent colloquial English is a bad sign. If she understands "get your kit off" but not "balance of payments deficit" then she probably learned it between the love making sessions. Ordinary Thais do not speak English well. However the upper class is extremely well adapt to the linguistic set of American Urban Language.

5. Your girl may be plausible for a Virgin Mary but her friends might give the game away. If her girlfriends drink, smoke, play pool, have tattoos or just seem a bit rough then they are hookers and so too is your girl.

4. Many guys seem to leave their brain behind when they go to Thailand. The media loves to stereotype the daft old git who believes that a stunning Thai babe is crazy for him. So know thy ugly ass self be true.

3. Do not succumb to the White Knight Syndrome, no matter how lonely, kind-hearted person you are. Arriving in Bangkok with plenty of damsels apparently in distress to choose from. It is a false belief that hookers want to be saved, they all have enough money to save themselves.

2. Thai girls differ from their respectable western sisters only in their approachability, sunny disposition, striking good looks and devious nature. They are similar in that they enjoy casual sex with the best looking guy they can find.

1. A sincere, marriage-minded man should avoid hookers at all costs.

For a complete definitive guide to anything Thai without the bullshit tourism bias go to www.mangosauce.com

Disclaimer Of all women I ever been with Asians, Blondies, Bonitas, and Brown Sugars the woman that ever loved me the most happen to be a Thai woman.

7 ways to spot a Gold Digger

Well last Saturday I got myself pretty much torn up at Spike and Nobu with my usual drinking wingman Smash Gorden himself. Only me and Smash Gorden could deviated such a well thoughtout plan of watching the Omen into drinking venture until you could see Lucifer himself. Trust me alcohol fest from 7:00pm till 2:00am will sure make you wish that hell is not a bad refuge than the hangover next day. As the night went by when I was at Nobu, a usual glamour spot of women and cash flashing playas had me ponder upon the Age old stereotype, the Gold Digger. So I went on the collection some golden rules for hoping that it would be a guide for men to avoid this sub-species of woman



7. She has her name like a stripper or pornstar ex, Cystal,Dom P, Candy, Bambi, and etc.

6.She has no job or she told you that she is in between jobs

5.Her Favorite word is "Shopping"

4.She tells you that her "procedure" is "real expensive"

3.She wears expensive brand name clothes & jewelry, but she can't pronounce "Dolce and Gabbana"

2.She likes to dance to Hip Hop music but yet not down with the "Black Cats"

1.She would like to know how much you earned and she is not charging

Asian Words of Wisdom in Rule of Engagement to the Opposition Sex

It was quite fortunate for me on the past Friday night that I ran into an old acquaintance at Spike. It was refreshing to the mind, actually running into the more intelligent drinker in a bar (I know it can be an oxymoron) at least time will fly a bit faster with Scotches and a good company. However as many subjects exchanged vary from how inkjet will save the world to which girls got a bigger knockers, a topic came up and it had to deal with woman and relationship. Personally I really think that for people who never actually live with a woman before in their life, they never truly experience an agony of a voluntary jail time. The humorous thing is those who seek thriving to excel, once you got into the matrimony phase you're fucked, like buying a secondhand corvette that has engine of its own mind. I'm not really saying these pessimistic views because I'm an expert on the subject at hand. However from my own experience, I have lived with three different women in my life, first was of three years, second and the third was two years each. So if you get the picture add them all up and I already got a marriage! It's such a bitter sweet agony that I almost married the first one with 5000 dollars sign on bonus I was planning to buy her a ring but thank God I found out she's been cheating on me for a few months. So I spent my bonus in rather worth while manner for female in general, financing young ladies for their college education and crack addiction in a few strip joints and it was quite liberating. To me these days I found out that there are certain rules of engagement that all men should come up with before venturing into the path of serious companionship, after all you will be affect by their ever raging hormones, your mind will not work straight neither. Anyways here is a little tips that help me discern the wilderness of tricks, hopefully this might be some use for you fellas contemplating getting a girlfriend.



Asian Words of Wisdom in Rule of Engagement to the Opposition Sex

10. Hold your conversation with a woman like you would have in a bar, never talk about religion or politics unless it deals with their suffrage or the lack there of.

9. Every woman is self-conscious about their ass. Tell her you love her ass and you might have a chance to spank it.

8. Ugly girls like to hang out with pretty girls because it makes them feel like they're more attractive. Pretty girls hang out with ugly girls for the same reason.

7. Women and Lesbians like to hangout with gay guys because at least they pretend to care

6. Never trust a girl who has no girlfriends. She doesn't get along with other women because she likes to hangout in the loony bins or she's a bitch.

5. The quickest way to end a relationship with your girls, just borrow some money from her. (Even though you got IPO from Google).

4. When a woman complains about her problems, she doesn't want you to offer solutions

3. Woman always want to believe what you're saying is true.

2. If you have something to hide, she'll find it so don't be afraid to lie

1. You will never know how many guys she's slept with. The Standard lie is five. Which really mean 10 (minimum projection).